I'll put it in a list for you. Maybe I can avoid all of my previous rhetoric about somebody needing to be fired or disowned for signing off on this trash.
*I hate stories that just jump from one "adventure" to another one with no climax or resolution. There was no story here.
*The music selections were terrible and not catchy. Most were unrecognizable to the general public.
*The jokes were generic. I know some 10-year-olds who could come up with better ones that would not be as predictable.
*For me, the Disney ripoffs with Pirates of the Caribbean, You've Got a Friend in Me, and Orlando are pretty much an acknowledgement of inferiority. Even though some of the other characters are classics, Disney has already exploited them to the point that characters like Robin Hood (Friar Tuck) and Peter Pan (Mr. Smee) are almost fully Disney characters. It's hard to take back such rooter characters, and this was a weak effort. If this is anything like the Pirates and Princesses Cruise on the Branson Belle, I don't need to take that cruise either. At the same time, someone didn't even think to cross-market the cruise with this show, which would have been quite simple to do. I'd mention that they even used a song from the Muppets, but people don't relate that to Disney. And, although it's not Disney, they jabbed a line in there about Shrek and Donkey, as well, just to get a cheap laugh. All of these things take the audience outside of Silver Dollar City.
*Isn't Mr. Smee and Peter Pan character who runs around with Captain Hook? Why is he here with Long John Silver?
*He is the cook, but is John Silver ever called a "captain" in Treasure Island?
*At least twice, they referenced the "very expensive forest" as if to say that they even know that it was overpriced.
*The flat sets looked cheap. In fact, they also don't even fit behind each other well enough to hide them when they are not on stage.
*The line about margarita night in one of the songs was inappropriate for the setting, especially if the show was supposed to appeal to kids.
*The hiphop monks were pandering and mildly offensive. Their colorful socks worked for the gag, but the Converse shoes were stupid. I'm not sure if they were just trying to force a gospel message into the show, but this was too weird.
*The kid being named Reuben Branson was a cheap gag, and they practically had to beg the audience to laugh at it, as if they thought they had to explain the joke before the punch line ever arrived. By the way, why are so many SDC characters named Rube and Reuben? Had the boy been a Dugan, it would have been a nice nod.
*Dialogue was boring, as if the writer was forcing scenes together with a lot of explanation.
*There was no reason for a bunch of gimmicky singing skulls on Long John Silver's ship.
*The soundtrack does not blend as one show. The songs don't even stick to a particular genre.
*No swashes were buckled. At some time it would have been nice to have felt like Reuben was in danger. It would have been nice to have forgotten that it was all a dream. It would have been nice to have some kind of struggle, some emotional drama.
*They kept repeating "You look vaguely familiar" to David's characters, as if they thought the audience was too stupid to recognize he was the same actor in different roles.
*Why was he the same actor in different roles? That didn't tie anything together, and could have made more sense if he had shown up as a real person in Reuben's cabin at the end (like the Wizard of Oz).
*No other characters had to have different names, so why the Marlin gag? Just so they could make another reference to Orlando/Disney?
*How is it that Long John Silver stayed with Reuben for the entire non-adventure? It might have been nice for Reuben to have discovered strength of character by protecting a weaker character along the way instead of dancing around with the pirate captain while trekking through the forest (Did I mention it's a very expensive forest?).
*Was Reuben sufficiently troubled by his lack of destiny at the beginning (He's not even wary of meeting Long John Silver.)? Was there really a need for a swashbuckling adventure at all? What was all of this talk of destiny? I thought the kid just wanted to read himself to sleep, but all of the sudden the kid needs to find himself.
*Gypsies, who are called vagabonds (I don't think anyone ever mentioned the word gypsies.), suddenly appear, but why? If all of these are supposed to be characters of classic stories, what book did the gypsies come out of? I don't recall any of them being named.
*Sing along? They ask the audience to sing along to a song most of us have probably never heard, carting out a giant, gaudy scroll and unfurling the words to one verse of the song. For some reason the scroll remains unfurled during the next verse, even thought the words are different.
*Where was the million dollar show? The only thing that looked expensive was the upstage digital screen. Some live pyrotechnics could have also been engaged for the end celebration.
*The lyrics seem rushed and any witty ones are lost as it takes longer to mentally process them than the audience is provided.
*I'm not sure how Reuben and his mom get back to the fantasy at the end. The whole thing was supposed to be a dream, but now they just have to "believe" and all the characters reappear for the finale.
*Usually these shows have a huge, natural standing ovation at the end. Not here. The audience stopped clapping before the actors faded into the background. Actors waved as they walked upstage, and the audience was packing up to leave. Embarrassing.
Again, they performers and crew work very hard with what they've been given. They do the best job possible. They try very hard to make this show as entertaining as possible, but they must be frustrated to find that the reaction is lackluster. None of my critique is against the crew and cast who seem to have everything under control. My criticism is completely against the creators of the show and whomever allowed this to be produced in the first place.
After setting the bar with their Christmas shows, they probably wanted something similar to appeal to kids, but they need to let Disney do Disney. They've been successful with Dickens and Wonderful Life, but this one falls far short of its mark.
The best parts? Long John Silver's entrance on the rope, the Defying Gravity entrance for Marlin, and the part where I got to leave.