A new "Top" list (Classic TV)

[Andymeets1880s]

I am not gone just yet, but thought I would go out with a big bang on a very wide subject. This is another "top" list dealing with classic tv. A "Top ways you know you watch too much classic tv" list. With our different interests and tastes, this list should be a doozy! Remember, this is a CLASSICS list. so no Seinfeld or Friends. List your "top" way and then put the tv show behind it for those who might not be sure what you are talking about or having trouble rattling their memory. You'll see what I mean as I start it. Let fly, folks! This could be the biggest and best list yet! Have fun!

1. Your spouse stares at you when you try to do the dishes, mow the lawn and paint the house by folding your arms together and blinking your eyes. (I Dream of Jeannie)

2. You have one chair in your living room that is designated as YOUR chair! (All in the Family)

3. You refer to your wife as Number 1, your daughter as Number 2 and your son as Number 3. (The Andy Griffith Show)

4.  You get flustered when your cell phone provider wont give you the number BR-549. (Hee Haw)

5. When you get indigestion pains in your chest, you grab your chest and announce that this is "the big one!" (Sanford and Son)

6. When leaving the house for Home Depot, you tell your wife you'll "be back with more stuff!" and then clap your hands and point at her. (The Gong Show)

7. You complain to your mother-in-law at dinner that her meatloaf is so bad (prompting your children to reply "How bad is it?") much to the chagrin of your wife! (Match Game)

8. Your kids wonder how you know things before they tell you! They also wonder why there are wires coming out from the coffee pot. (Hogan's Heroes)

9. You buy musical instruments for the whole family. Announce you are going to learn them and go on tour! (The Partridge Family)

10. (Men) Unhappy at your job? You start wearing women's dresses and ensembles in hopes that they will fire you. (M*A*SH)


Hope you enjoy this list. There are infinite possibilities!!!!!!!!!!! Please number them so we can see just how many we can compile!

[Andymeets1880s]

Hmmm.....no additions to this list?! Have my "top" lists worn out their welcome? It's ok if they have. If anyone thinks maybe the lists have gotten old or too long, you're not going to hurt my feelings! I was kinda afraid I might burn you all out on them, but thought maybe they would still take.

Seriously, gang....if they are kinda old, i'll drop em' for awhile. 

[betamike]

You stumped me on this one Andy.  For me it isn't that I am bored with the thread...it's just that I can't think of anything to top this!

[Andymeets1880s]

Well, beta..there's no topping it. Just come up with some ideas like we did the other "top" lists. If you have to, refer back to some of the other lists. Like the "how to make your home more like SDC" list. Follow my example from above.

[Zephon]

Well, it ain't easy the way you structured it, but I'll give it a go.

1.  You keep hoping that the SDC train will take that spur that leads to the Shady Rest Hotel.   

2.  Every time you open up a map, you expect a flame to start burning a hole in the middle of it.

3.  Your significant other gets mad at when you're watching an action flick together and you start yelling out "Pow," "Whiff," "Bang," in all the fight scenes.

4.  Every time you step into an elevator, you say "Beam me up, Scotty," as you push the button.

5.  Every time you hear a phone ring, you automatically reach for your shoe.

6.  You're afraid to take a three hour tour on the Ducks.

7.  You're in the habit of calling your best friend "Kimosabi."

8.  Ticked off at the current Obama administration, you refer to them as THRUSH.

9.  When you get excited about something, you can't help but scream out "Shazam!"

10. Every time you get ticked off at your significant other, you yell out "One of these days, their name here, POW, right in the kisser.








1. Petticoat Junction
2. Bonanza
3. Batman
4. Star Trek
5. Get Smart
6. Gilligan's Island
7. The Lone Ranger
8. The Man From U.N.C.L.E.
9. Gomer Pyle, USMC
10. The Honeymooners

[Andymeets1880s]

Zephon, I think I structured it ok. This is like all of the other lists I have done. Only this one has you name your show at the end of each example. I did that so if anyone had trouble trying to remember what example you put down, they had the show there to jostle the memory bank.
You had some dandies on your list. The "Get Smart" example was a hoot!

[Andymeets1880s]

1. When trying to get your family to load up in the car, you shout "Move it! Move it! Move it!" (Gomer Pyle U.S.M.C.)

2. Your husband has to tumble over the ottoman every time he comes home from work. (Dick Van Dyke Show)

3. When company comes over, you sit at your desk and line chairs up three on one side (The Tonight Show)

4. When your child has broken something, you ask them to "Splain" what happened (I Love Lucy)

5. You surprise your family when they call the dog and the living room stairs lift up (The Munsters)

[History Buff]

8.  Ticked off at the current Obama administration, you refer to them as THRUSH.

  Or KAOS. (also Get Smart)

When your mom asks you what you'd like for dinner, you always say "Pork chops....and apple sauce."  (Brady Bunch)

To save your life, you can't see what Joanie sees in Chachi.  (Joani Loves Chachi)

When something goes wrong, your standard response is "I know nutzing!"  (Hogan's Heroes)

When something goes right, your standard response is "I love it when a plan comes together."  (A-Team)

You wait and wait, but your dog never saves anyone from the well.  (Lassie)

You wait and wait, but your porpoise never saves anyone from drowning.  (Flipper)

You still attempt to jump-slide across the hood of your car when you're in a hurry.  (Starsky and Hutch)

You cringe when a girl looks at you strangely.  (Dobie Gillis)

You order incessantly from ACME, and devise all sorts of plans for how to eliminate you greatest enemy, but you're never successful.  (Road Runner)

When it's time for bed, you tell your kids, "Th-th-that's all folks!"  (Looney Tunes)

Every Thanksgiving, you rush out to the local strip mall and wait for someone to drop free turkeys from a helicopter.  (WKRP)

You insensitively refer to all Asians as Hop Sing, all caucasians as Honky, all African Americans as Rerun, and all Hispanics as Chico.  (Bonanza, Jeffersons, What's Happening, Chico and the Man)

You are constantly on the lookout for gremlins on the plane's wing.  (Twilight Zone)

Your husband comes home one day, and he's not the same person, but you act as if he is.  (Bewitched)

Your favorite curse word is "Shazbot!"  (Mork and Mindy)

Your favorite put-down is "Sit on it!"  (Happy Days)

Your favorite shout of joy is "Dy-no-mite!"  (Good Times)

Your favorite way of showing gratitude is to say "Thank you veddy much."  (Taxi)

When someone illegally parks in a handicapped spot you start running in circles, shouting "Citizens Arrayest, citizens arrayest!"  (Gomer Pyle)

You still wear your "Daisy Dukes" in public.  (Dukes of Hazard)

You wonder why no one on Ice Road Truckers has a chimpanzee.  (BJ and the Bear)

Everytime you wake up in a strange place and see an odd face in the mirror, you say to yourself, "Oh boy."  (Quantum Leap) - that one's for you tinaalsgirl.

You are constantly shocked when the cops on COPS draw their guns.  (CHiPS)

When Michael complains about H.R. on The Office, you always think, "Puffinstuff???"

You tend to think that everything you overhear is a euphemism for infidelity.  (Three's Company)

When they become unruly, you tell the kids in your fourth grade class to "Nip it!  In the bud!"  (Andy Griffith)

You insist on having "roll call" at the dinner table (and you named your son Cubby).  (Mickey Mouse Club)

You still wake up in the middle of the night wondering what shlamil and schlamozzle mean.  (Laverne and Shirley)

Someone gives you an instruction, you can't resist telling them, "O-tay, Thpanky!"  (Little Rascals)



Well, you did ask for it...

[Andymeets1880s]

Whoooo....look at HB go off!! That's tellin us! The "Brady Bunch" and "Bewitched" lines were great!
Here's are a few more....

When visiting someone, you just bust through their door, swing it wide open and flatly say "Hello!" (Laverne and Shirley)

When you know someone is about to tell you a long, drawn out story, you stop them quickly and say "Just the facts, ma'am/sir" (Dragnet)

Your family gets worried about you when you are constantly trying to start appliances and motors by tapping them with the side of your fist (Happy Days)

Whenever there is anything remotely hazardous or dangerous around you, you flail your arms shouting "Danger!, Danger!" (Lost In Space)

[Junior]

I've enjoyed reading through everyone's postings here. You are very clever folks!  Glad to see there are some fans of old classic shows out there!

[Andymeets1880s]

You know the funniest thing, Junior? Can you actually imagine people carrying out the examples from all of these lists? Think about someone taking some of these ideas from all of these lists to heart?! LOLOL!

Here's more Classic tv examples....

When someone tells a bad joke or does something you dont like, you smack them over the head with your ballcap. (Gilligan's Island)

You are going over your checkbook and refer to zeros as "noughts" (Beverly Hillbillies)

To have a private conversation with your spouse, you install domes to lower from the ceiling and cover you at your kitchen table. (Get Smart)

You ask your wife to start wearing fancy dresses and a pearl necklace around the house. (Leave it to Beaver)

When having to go into the hospital for a procedure, you tell those concerned that you'll first be put in Pre-Op, then have your operation in the O.R.  and afterwards you'll recover in the Post-Op. (M*A*S*H)

You install a speaker system throughout your house to call the kids to dinner or have a family meeting. You begin each announcement with "Attention...all personnel!" (M*A*S*H)

[History Buff]

At the end of the day, grandpa comes into the living room and rambles on and on about his most recent observations.  (60 Minutes)

When the mail comes, you place each piece to your forehead and predict what is inside.  (Tonight Show with Johnny Carson)

When someone gets you riled, your muscles bulge, you rip off your shirt, and you run into the forest.  (Incredible Hulk)

When special skills are needed that you can only accomplish with a partner, would do a fist bump and yell, "Wonder Twins, activate!" (Superfriends)

You end sentences with the word even (i.e., We're going to Silver Dollar City even.  We're riding Wildfire even.  I'm going to get a funnel cake even.).  (Snaggletooth - not sure of the title)

You use strange words when surprised or amazed  (i.e., zoinks, jeepers).  (Scooby Doo)

A beautiful, scantily-clad girl lives in your living room and wants to spend every minute of the day serving you - and you refuse to let her!  (I Dream of Jeanie)

When you don't understand what someone says, you stick out your bottom lip and ask them, "Whatchutalkinbout?"

You water ski in your leather jacket.  (Happy Days)

When backseat driving, you tell your wife to speed up by yelling, "Do it to it like Sonny Pruitt!"  (Movin' On)

Following a friend in another car, you exclaim, "I'm in hot pursuit!  Acu cu cu!"  (Dukes of Hazard)

You refer to the OnStar operator as KITT.  (Knight Rider)

When your son needs a haircut, you refer to him as Cousin Itt.  (Addams Family)

You pass by people in peril, claiming it is a violation of the Prime Directive.  (Star Trek, TNG)

You introduce yourself and your family by telling them you are Larry, and this is your brother Darryl and your other brother Darryl.  (Newhart)

You insist your change be given to you in Clams.  (Sigmund and the Sea Monsters)

Your worst enemy is known by all as Witcheepoo.  (H.R. Puffenstuff)

When you fall for bad knock-knock jokes, ping pong balls fall on your head.  (Captain Kangaroo)

You greet people with a special handshake and proclaim, "Na-nu, na-nu."  (Mork and Mindy)

You overlook the cute girl next door and prefer the high-maintenance movie star instead. (Gilligan's Island)

When camping, you fill your flashlight battery compartment with beans just in case you get lost.  (Brady Bunch)

You greet you teacher every day with the hi-sign, and recite chorally with the rest of the class, "Hi-i-i, Crabby."  (Little Rascals)

It never gets old:  at the airport, every time one comes into view, you point and exclaim, "Da plane, da plane!"  (Fantasy Island)

When you see a police officer administering a sobriety test, you shout out the window, "Book 'im, Dano!"  (Hawaii 5-O)

You call your friends Lumpy, Cockroach, and Boner, and yet you are never considered a bully.  (Leave It to Beaver, Cosby Show, Growing Pains)

You do back flips when your wife speaks French.  (Addams Family)

You wonder when the American Pickers will ever find their way to the Sanford junkyard.  (Sanford and Son)

You mix your milk with Pepsi.  (Laverne and Shirley)

You tug at your ear when telling people good night.  (Carol Burnett Show)

Each person in your large family must tell another person "good night" in succession until everyone has heard a personal "good night" at least once.  (Waltons)

[Junior]

Ha! I think you all have too much time on your hands to think up such funny stuff as this!